30 things about parenting that I’ve learnt in 3 decades of being a mom

My eldest daughter just turned 29 and I realised that in another year I’ve spent 3 decades parenting.

Almost 30 years of my life as a mom ….30 years of growing in wisdom.

Today I’d like to share 30 parenting secrets I’ve learnt along the way ….

30 things about parenting that I’ve learnt in 3 decades of being a mom

1. Love your child ….regardless and as is. Totally and unapologetically unconditionally without reserve.

2. Be honest ….if your child asks a question answer honestly and to their level of understanding. And let them be honest with you.

3. Keep the magic …now there is no need to be too honest about things that make childhood magical like Santa, the Easter bunny, Tooth fairy or leprechauns.

4. One childhood …our children only get one chance at a childhood let them enjoy it.

5. Discipline…is needed and vital for your child to function in society. Don’t be afraid to say no. Spoilt children who never learn the word no are not pleasant to be around.

6. I love you …Kids need to hear these words, often.

7. I hate you …you will hear these words more than once, don’t take it personally.

8. A child will often lash out or behave worse with a parent they feel safe with. Set boundaries if your child is acting out, but rest assured they know you love them and feel safe expressing themselves.

9. Boundaries and rules are important and needed both for you to run your home and grow your child safely and for your child to feel secure and function in society as an adult one day.

10. There are no perfect parents , all the perfect parents haven’t had kids yet.

11. Trust your gut/ intuition and instincts, you know your child better than anyone else.

12. It is OK to be different. Teach your child early to embrace their financial situation, love their faith or religion and be proud of their culture and heritage.

13. Patience is the trick to great parenting. ( and huge amounts of coffee, a mom bun and sensible shoes)

14. Teaching our children tolerance, respect and acceptance for others will give them a better standing in life than all the money or good schools ever could.

15. Lead by example. Your child will follow what you do long before they listen to what you say.

16. You don’t always need to like your child…you do need to love them and guide them out of the phases you don’t like.

17. You can’t choose your child’s friends, you can however discuss why you don’t like them and step back to trust your child to make the right choices.

18. Your child needs roots …they need a stable home with strong morals, good values and family traditions to become the best people they can be.

19. They also need wings … independence is critical to them becoming functional adults in society and it’s advisable to start independence young by teaching them to clean their toys, pack their bags, make their bed, etc

20. Responsibility… goes hand in hand with independence. Teach your child to be responsible for themselves and their belongings.

21. We all make mistakes.. but teach them to take responsibility if they make a mistake. Also teach them no mistake is too big it can’t be fixed. Let them know you love them even if they mess up.

22. A family that cleans together has a happier mom …teach your children to do chores and help out around the house. This cuts moms cleaning time down giving her more time to spend with the kids and prepares our children for life in the real world one day when mom isn’t there to do the laundry.

23. Laugh…play and have fun. Life is not always serious so enjoy the time playing together.

24. Pick your battles…you don’t always need to follow the rules to the T. There can be times when you break the rules, or deviate from them slightly. It’s OK for your children to go to bed later on a weekend or eat a cupcake for breakfast on their birthday. This teaches the kids balance.

25. Show charity and kindness to strangers but more importantly show it to your family. Teach your children to value family and be kind to others.

26. Mom needs a break …take the time to do something for yourself. You are not a bad mom if you leave them over night at their grandparents just to seep or go on that momcation alone. Our children need happy moms so we need to fill our cups often.

27. Your kids will know better than you …until they have kids and then you will be the wisest woman again.

28. Soak up the cuddles and love when they are little and learn your child’s love language so that you can understand how to connect when they are teens.

29. Mom guilt …don’t go there. If you have always done the best you knew how and changed when you knew better then you are a perfect amazing and wonderful mother, even if your best did not look like someone else’s.

30. Take the photos… one day you will want the memories 💕

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